Urine Testing FAQ
There are many prodcuts that people say will guarantee results, but they are not accurate and they will not help you pass a drug test. These include the following:
- Fiber pills
- Ready Clean pills
- Rapid Cleanse
- Detox Tea
- XXtra Clean
- Quick Flush
- Terminator Gold
- Clear Choice
- Vale Triple Strength
The reason I bring these up is for two reasons. First, they are not going to help you pass a drug test, and only are floating around to give you a misconception into some of the shortcuts people try and take, only to realize that the results they are after never come and end up in a positive result.
The second is because THC is a fat soluble substance. Any fat soluble substance cannot be removed by the body without exercise, time, patience, and a healthy diet consisting of high fiber coupled with low fat and plenty of fluids. There is no way to rapidly remove THC from the body, and there is no way to bind them into the system so that your urine does not excrete THC metabolites into the urine stream. Think of the urine in your body as a dumping ground for substances the body is trying to remove. For this reason, you are going to most likely find THC metabolites in your urine for much longer periods of time than in blood.
For the so-called "wonder potions," I am not saying that they do not work for some people, because people have used them and passed. In reality, these are usually nothing more than creatine mixed with vitamins, water, and sugar. So ask yourself, "Is it worth the $30 to get this drink when you can get the same results from water, b-complex, creatine supplement, and a good dilution regimen?"
Heavy (Chronic) Smokers
A chronic smoker could need a long time to clean out. Documented cases for a man who was 400 pounds needing 14 weeks to clean out have been cited, but for most, you are looking at a chronic smoker needing at least a month, sometimes 6 weeks, sometimes 8 weeks. So if you smoke once a day or more, look at these timeframes for yourself and gauge your job hunting or tests appropriately.
If you exercise, knock off some of the time, but keep in mind it is dependant upon your size and your body fat percentage. If you weigh 200 pounds but are all muscle, it will take much less time than someone who weighs 200 pounds and has mostly fat. Conversly, if you do exercise, it needs to be done for a period of time in order to raise your metabolism. Metabolic rates rise slowly, so working out for a week is not going to change yourself dramatically, whereas a two month training regimen can have dramatic results.
Saunas do not do much of anything except cause you to sweat a lot. If you are a regular smoker, i.e. once or twice per week, look at a 2-3 week timeframe to clean out after your last smoke. This too will vary from person to person depending on size described above.
Occasional (Light) Smokers
If you smoke once per month or less, look at 10 days or less to clean out. The key here is time. Remember, fat cells recirculate slowly in all bodies no matter how active you are. My advice to all would be to home test yourself often as you are detoxing to see exactly how long it takes to clean out. Use your first morning void since it is most concentrated. No human body is the same as any other human body, and for this reason, there is no way to give an exact timeframe to clean out.
With the above lists, you should be able to gauge your own timing depending on three factors:
- Size (Weight)
- Exercise regimen
- Time you have had clean without smoking
Many arguments have been geared at dilution and techniques. Dilution is a very general and never precise exercise. For the record, dilution never is 100% guaranteed. You are filling you bladder with water to keep the levels of THC metabolites down. Think of dilution like a pool filled with floating objects in it. When the pool is only 1/4 filled, there are going to be more floating objects per unit volume. At 1/2 filled, the ratio will be lower, and there will be less floating objects per volume. At full volume, there is even less floating objects per unit volume. Dilution is the same thing.
As you consume fluids, more water is depositied in the urine stream. As more water is put into the urine, the number of THC metabolites per unit volume will go down. As you continue to dilute and the water levels go up, the ratio goes down even more, but as soon as you stop drinking water, the levels go back up.
The following guidelines are what I have recommended for dilution over the past years:
Drink Gatorade or Powerade. The electrolytes are going to help keep your specific gravity up. The specific gravity of your urine dictates how dilute you are. If it drops below 1.003, you are going to run into urine being too diluted. If you are diluting, it is recommended you add 1/4 teaspoon of salt per 8-ounce bottle of Gatorade or Powerade you drink. It may sound gross, but how important is your passing grade?
Once you have drank all this fluid, you should be urinating every 15-20 minutes. Keep drinking as long as you are getting ready for the test, and don't stop until after you give your sample. Without doing this, the ratio of THC metabolites in your urine will start to rise again.
A B-complex vitamin should be taken at least one hour before your deadline. This gives your urine that nice yellow color the labs are looking for, even though it is still mostly water. It is also a good idea to use aspirin—not Tylenol or Advil—thirty minutes before the test. Four to five 325 mg aspirins is sufficient. I recommend any generic or Bayer.
Creatinine is another substance that can be used to validate a sample. You can raise these levels two ways: by eating red meat, or taking a creatine supplement, available at most healthfood stores. Look for creatine monohydrate or cell-tech, or variations of these. You need to use creatine at the minimum 72 hours prior to your deadline. If you don't, it is not going to help you out since the body needs a couple of days to convert creatine, the content of which you consume, into creatinine, the substance in the urine.
This makes up the validity of the sample: creatinine levels, and specific gravity, or salt, as described above. In addition, make sure you urinate often before your deadline. Ten times or more is not uncommon and very helpful.
The old adage of loading water into your system days before the test is not needed. Remember, you should get eight 8-ounce glasses of water per day as part of a healthy diet. This is a good number to stick to, and it is only 1/2 a gallon and should be attainable by most of you. It helps you keep healthy and urinating often. If you want to drink cranberry juice that is good too, it helps prevent urinary tract infections.
When you go to the lab, give a midstream sample, first urinating into the toilet, then into the cup, and the remainder into the toilet. This is the least concentrated part of the sample. Never give your first urine of the day! If you are diluting, again, it would be helpful to get yourself a home test and test yourself before you go to the labs. If you pass the home test, you are in great shape.
Home Drug Test Kits
Home tests work! They are accurate and are the same ones that hospitals, probation officers, and labs use for the most part. The cutoff is 50 ng/mL for these home tests and is the SAMHSA standard for the government and most labs around the country. The GC-MS test is only a test to confirm a positive. Rarely, due to cost, is it ever used as an initial screening. The expense does not dictate using it for initial testing. The dip tests are much cheaper and quicker and give accurate results. Here is where the aspirin fits in: the aspirin can help fool the EMIT tests, so by using aspirin, you are going to have an edge on the test itself.
Waiting for results is hard. Labs can take a few business days to report results, and then you have to wait for the employer to contact you. Never call your Human Resources and asked if you passed your test. More strategically, call to make sure everything is in order and be inquisitive but not pushy. If you never hear about the test again, consider that a good sign. Most employers assume you are clean and only test as a formality. Unless you fail, most Human Resources recruiters will not notify you of the results, but if you are working that is always a good sign.
For employment, if you fail, you just miss out on a job and that sucks, but is not the end of the world. Other jobs will come along. But probation can mean jail time and other consequences. If you are on probation, choose wisely. Urinating in a cup is much easier than living in a cell or going to clinics or rehabs because you took a couple of hits. And passing your first probation urine screening is always a good singn to your P.O. that you are a good person and don't do drugs.
Any type of ruffage type food is good during the days leading up to and including the day of the test. Eating fatty foods and laying around is probably the worst thing for you at this point. Instead, try to eat fiber and low fat foods. Good choices are eggs, peanuts, bran, low fat turkey, chicken, salads, fruits and vegetables, cranberry and other fruit juices, wheats, liver, soy, proteins.
Things to avoid include greasy foods, high carbohydrate type foods, white breads, high sugar foods, candy, chocolate, and the like. Sure this seems more like a weight loss diet, but the goal here is to consume foods that will force your body to break down fat reserves and turn them over into new cells, thereby removing the THC metabolites that collect in the lipid tissue.
Fiber, for instance, causes more fat cells to be excreted through the feces. Cranberry juice helps to excrete more toxins into the urine stream. There are many ways to clean out quickly, but these are tried and true methods.
Combining this with a good exercise regimen, you are arming yourself with two very important factors to a slower detox time, and since so many of you are on short notice detox programs, it is always good to do everything possible to acheive that goal.
Arming yourself with information can be the best plan of action for any drug test; by reading this and following your instincts, you should be able to pull it off if you have some strength, the ability to quit for a period of time, and patience. Remember, the longer you quit, the better your chances always become.