6. Producing Clean Urine

THC is fat soluble, and it gets stored in your fat cells. Cleaning it out of your lipid tissue is very difficult. Many herbal products claim to clean out your system, yet they do nothing to remove THC byproducts from fat cells. In 1993, a study was done in Germany on 50 of the most common herbs used by people trying to pass the test. All 50 herbs failed to cause a negative. Unfortunately, this rumor will not die. Goldenseal, a plant, is useless, yet it's the most common thing for people to use. The only way to extract THC from fat cells is to exercise. Fat cells secrete fat with THC metabolites at a constant rate, regardless of what herbs you consume. You may be able to temporarily clean THC metabolites from your bloodstream, or dilute your fluids to yield a larger urine to THC ratio, but your bloodstream will continue collecting THC metabolites from fat. Your urine will continue collecting THC metabolites from your bloodstream.

6.1 Dilution

Hyper saturating your body with fluids will dilute metabolites possibly below the 50 ng/mL threshold, depending on your metabolism. Be aware that creatinine levels are often tested, and will show that the sample has been diluted. Diluting your sample will also produce clear urine, with virtually no yellow color. They will assume that you've diluted your sample, and they may reject your sample on the basis of color alone. It's only necessary to start drinking just before the test. Those who drown themselves in fluid days before a test are only causing unnecessary discomfort. Those who stay up all night drinking don't have any better chance than one who drinks heavily first thing in the morning. Get up early if the test is early, but don't lose sleep over a test that's given in the daytime.

6.1.1 Water

Drink at least eight hefty glasses of fluid, preferably water, just prior to the test. Many people start drinking water several days before the test, which is useless. Water does not clean any THC metabolites out of your system because THC is not water soluble. Water only dilutes urine temporarily. Do not over do it, because you can get water intoxication. People can actually overdose and even die from water intoxication. It's very hard to do, and you'll vomit before anything gets serious.

6.1.2 Creatinine Level

Eating red meat will boost creatinine levels. If you eat a lot of red meat for the three days prior to the test, your creatinine level will be normal, and the lab won't know that you've diluted your urine sample.

6.1.3 Vitamin B

Color your sample yellow by taking 50 to 100 milligrams of vitamin B. Many vitamins will work, but B-2 or B-12—which is found in B-complex vitamins—are the most effective, though some will argue that vitamin C is better. This will also help if you plan to dope your sample. This does not guarantee that dilution will work. Diluted samples have been red-flagged when specific gravity and creatinine levels are tested and below normal. If you're taking vitamins at the last minute, check to see if they're time release. If so, crush it up and consume the powder. Coloring your urine isn't all that important because it's normal for people to have clear urine even when they don't consume much fluid.

6.2 Diuretics

Diuretics make people urinate frequently. Coffee, cranberry juice, beer, iced tea, herbal tea, and Pepsi are all good diuretics. Grapes are known to be very good diuretics. Diuretics without caffeine or alcohol are recommended because caffeine and alcohol have negative side effects. Cranberry juice is also the cheapest. Avoid salts. Herbal diuretics do better than home remedies like juices.

6.2.1 Ultimate Blend

This product used to be known as Test Free, but the name was changed. Ultimate Blend is a diuretic designed for the test, but works no better than other diuretics. Ultimate Blend is sold by Zydot Unlimited, Inc.

6.2.2 Detoxify Carbo Clean

This is a very new product, untested by a third party. It claims to absorb toxins, however, experts say that absorbing THC metabolites from fat cells is impossible. Here is a copy of the ad from Party Hut Enterprizes:

Detoxify Carbo Clean is a scientifically formulated carbohydrate blend that works by absorbing toxins and impurities. It has been featured in High Times, and we are so confident of the results that we are offering a double-your-money-back guarantee for any failed results. This is the most complete program for the cleanest results! Precleanse herbal capsules are enclosed in every box of Carbo Clean. This extra advantage helps you begin cleansing the evening before the deadline. B-Complex tablets complete the program.

6.2.3 Naturally Klean Herbal Tea

Naturally Klean claims to clear any drug metabolites for a few hours after taking. Drink this shortly before the test. Naturally Klean was also listed as a drug screen in previous versions, but according to some, "it will do nothing to help you pass a urine test;" with the exception that it will dilute your urine. You can get Naturally Klean from Martha Butterfield-Jay Foundation or J&J Enterprises. An anonymous user provided the ingredients list:

  1. Dandelion root
  2. Burdock root
  3. Red clover top
  4. Chamomile flower
  5. Alfalfa leaf
  6. Licorice root
  7. Slippery elm inner bark
  8. Hibiscus flower
  9. Dog rose hips
  10. Natural fruit flavors

Dandelion root is said to be the effective diuretic.

6.2.4 Goldenseal

Goldenseal is a plant and you can get either the root or the leaves in pill form. It's also a liquid or tea. The liquid is rumored to absorb slower than the capsules. Goldenseal is a diuretic, but works no better than other diuretics. Furthermore, NORML reports that Goldenseal is now being tested for. Taking Goldenseal is a waste of time.

6.2.5 Certa (Certo)

This is an untested diuretic. Certa has something to do with canning. Some people swear by it. Trouble is, it's always somebody else, a third party not present during the conversation, who uses it. I've heard rumors about people who smoked right up to the day before the test, consumed fruit pectin, a canning substance similar to Certa, and passed the test. However, there hasn't been any tests to validate those claims.

6.2.6 Vales Original Formula

Another herbal remedy like Goldenseal. It does nothing. The water you must take with it does everything Vales claims to do.

6.2.7 Lasix

Take an 80 milligram dose of prescription diuretic lasix (furosemide). Prescription diuretics are the most potent. Some over the counter diuretics will color your urine blue and should be avoided. Diuretics can be harmful to people with kidney problems, pregnant women, and diabetics.

6.3 Vinegar

There is a myth that drinking vinegar will mask drugs, but the truth is it won't. However, vinegar lowers the pH of urine. Amphetamines are excreted up to three times as fast when urine is acidified. So vinegar could reduce the detection time period for amphetamines. The effects on detection time are generally insignificant, and it in my opinion it really wouldn't be worth it to drink vinegar. If you do decide to drink vinegar, I hear it's easiest to get a shot glass and do it in shots. It will cause diarrhea.

6.4 Dexatrim

There is a myth that taking phenylpropanolamine, the active ingredient in Dexatrim, will work. It won't. In fact, Dexatrim is a false positive, and may work against you. The myth may have originated because Dexatrim was claimed to speed metabolism. However, the fact that Dextrim causes a positive makes it useless.

6.5 Fiber

A high fiber diet will help by redirecting fat soluble metabolites to the colon rather than bladder. THC is eliminated primarily in the stool via bile acids. Both EMIT and RIA detect a secondary metabolite which is reabsorbed from the intestines. Thus a person with a high fiber diet will excrete a majority of THC metabolites in the stool. A fiber-based laxitive will also help by binding bile-acids. Fiber laxitives can alter one's bowel schedule and lead to dependancy.

6.6 Vitamin Lecithin

A recent method that's still under development is to take vitamin lecithin. This vitamin breaks down your stored fat and disperses it into your blood stream, to help clean out drugs that store themselves in lipid tissue, such as THC. NORML recommends taking lecithin right up to the day of the test. To me it sounds as though this would work against you because by putting THC back in your blood stream, you are increasing metabolites in the urine. Someone has suggested that you take vitamin lecithin on a regular basis to clean lipids of THC metabolites. Then quit before the test, which seems to make more sense. It may be useless to take lecithin supplements orally. I've been told that the digestive system breaks it down too much before entering the blood stream. Most aren't willing to take vitamins intravenously. If you do decide to take lecithin, you might as well take B5 with it. B5 aids in the process of turning lecithin into acetylcholine. Another solution is to take nutrients which help the body manufacture lecithin. Lipotrophics cause the liver to produce lecithin. A good source for this information is Austin Nutritional Research.

6.7 How To Give A Clean Sample

Don't give urine from your first urination of the day. It's the dirtiest, and can be heavily filled with metabolites. Urinate a couple of times before giving a test sample. Also, don't give the beginning or end of the stream. Piss in the toilet, then quickly stop and go in the cup. Stop, and shift back to the toilet for the last portion. Only give a midstream sample. Just be sure to give 60 cc's.

6.8 Exercise

Athletes have a big advantage over non-athletic people. When fat is burned, THC byproducts are released into the blood. This is the only way to get THC metabolites out of lipid tissue. Normal living will burn them slowly, as your fat reserves get turned over. Due to an athletes high metabolic rate, THC moves through an athletes system significantly faster. Exercising between drug tests will clean THC metabolites from the system at a faster rate, thus lowering the detection period. It is important to stop burning fat cells near test time. On test day, it doesn't matter what's in your lipid tissue. What's in your blood and urine does matter. Exercise increases the amount of THC metabolites in the urine, so quit exercising a week before the test. Be lazy, and eat big. This will put the body in an anabolic fat-storing stage. At this point, the "buried" THC metabolites won't escape and go the the urine. There are drugs that will increase metabolism the way exercise does, but these are the same drugs that they are usually testing for. Exercise should only be considered when the subject knows that he or she will not be given a pop quiz in the near future.

6.9 Beta-2 Agonists

Studies have shown that Clenbuterol reduces fat, which would help rid lipid tissue of THC metabolities. Clenbuterol also increases metabolism. No studies have directly shown that Clenbuterol will help pass a drug test. However, provided that it reduces fat, I would assume that the fat breakdown would result in less fat soluble substances in the system. Clenbuteral is labeled as a performance enhancer, and it's on the banned list for athlete testing. If are being tested as an athlete, avoid Clenbuterol!

6.10 Beta-3 Agonists

Beta-3 agonists are drugs that stimulate the beta-3 andrenergic receptors on brown fat cells. The beta-3 andrenergic receptor is located on the surface of fat cells, and controls the amount of fat the cell releases into the bloodstream. When brown fat is stimulated, white fat is burned and converted into heat. Many people have mutant beta-3 andrenergic receptors, causing calories to be burned too slowly, thus leading to obesity. These people will benefit most from beta-3 agonist drugs. If the drug works as claimed, I believe it would reduce the detection time of fat soluble drugs by continually excreting metabolites into the bloodstream at a faster pace. As with vitamin lecithin and exercise, you would take beta-3 agonists between tests, and quit a couple days prior to the test. Beta-3 agonists have been in the development phase for the past 13 years. One firm is already testing a beta-3 drug in early clinical trials. It's not on the market yet.

6.11 Low Dosaging

If you're an athlete and get tested for steroids, you can still use anabolic steroids and possibly beat the cutoff. The body naturally produces testosterone, a steroid, and small amounts of testosterone show up in urine by default. Some athletes are able to keep their steroid intake low enough to indicate a natural level of steroids. A study was done finding that 67% of steroid users take more than the recommended amount, and they stack, meaning they take two or more different kinds of steroids. Steroids are only meant to be used in small amounts to begin with. Anything over a normal dose goes unused. Also, no study has shown stacking to be beneficial.